The good life is a process, not a state of being… The direction which constitutes the good life is that which is selected by the total organism, when there is psychological freedom to move in any direction.
—Carl Rogers
Living a life of aligned with your values means:
- Freedom
- You can stop carrying baggage
- Get and keep the relationships you desire
Wondering why you keep hitting walls? This will change it all for you.
Leaning into values-alignment in your life means casting a vote for the person that you most want to be on a daily basis. It means having a life that is worth putting the effort in and making the changes for. That’s what this blog post is about. It’s about finding the potential for valued living that may be hidden from view. It is about aligning with your values, so your actions fit your life. The meaning-filled and purposeful life is one where you are looking to live your values every single day.
When I’m working with people on their journey towards a meaningful and purposeful life, so many times they ask, “am I trying to come up with my vision based on my personal values or professional values, and I always will say ‘bring it all together!’ There is no difference. You are you both at work/school and at home, it is you that show ups every day in your job and at home. So it makes sense for you to be really clear on how you want to be showing up.
A values-aligned individual is someone who defines their core values and holds themselves accountable to those values.
If chosen freely and wisely, these core values will guide your practices to help you create a life of thriving and enrichment. You’ll find that your core values help serve as a compass for actions taken.
I have found that everyone has a WHY declaration that aligns with who they would most want to be in the world and it allows you to come back to your WHY and re-visit your values and remind yourself why you have chosen to commit to any effort or challenge you have undertaken. It also helps you to connect and remind yourself of the specific benefits that living a values aligned life brings into your life and the lives of your loved ones.
Values are our actions and behaviors. They are ways of living, not words. It is important that we identify that values are the things that you would freely chose to make important. Our values are lived out in the day-to-day moments, how we treat ourselves and others on an ongoing basis. Values are the directions along our journey of life, while goals are the markers along that journey. Values are about who we want to be in this world and in our relationships. And those relationships include our relationship with ourselves, since we’re the person we spend the most time with. Values have a consistency and integrity to them. They are the consistent compass that can guide all our interactions.
To identify values in your life, think about what a well-lived life would be for you personally, what you want your life to stand for, and the kind of person you want to be as you move through this world.
WHY Values?
So why do we talk about Values…
- Values create meaning
- Values provide consistency and sustain behavior
- Values tell you what works
- Values mean freedom, autonomy and ability to overcome obstacles
Values create meaning. Meaning is constructed in moments when we are connected with what matters, when we are in contact with a life we would define as being worth living. Being an individual who is guided by values works to build meaning and purpose by helping them have more and more moments connected with what matters most.
Values also provide consistency in that they can serve as a kind of verbal glue that links our actions and goals together to create a larger whole. Instead of life being a series of disconnected moments or accomplishments, values can be seen as part of a larger pattern or purpose. Values also provide consistency in that they are, arguably, an inexhaustible source of motivation. This can be contrasted with motivation based on aversive control strategies. In those times, our motivation is usually based on fear or shame or some other unpleasant feeling. But time passes, and with it so does that unpleasant feeling; and thus the motivation that was sustaining our behavior evaporates. We often need to be re-exposed to a motivator in order for that stimulus to continue to serve as a motivator and thus sustain behavior. Using values provides a more compassionate alternative and a more effective strategy when it comes to sustaining behavior change
Your dreams of a healthy, thriving life – live on the other side of consistency.
Values also tell you what works and at a fundamental level, values are the why. To be successful in life, having a “why” is essential. When you have a reason for doing what you are doing, that is powerful and touches something deep inside your core, that reason can lift you up and carry you through the most difficult of times. That reason (your “why”) can make the difference between your success versus falling victim to your own fears, or to the challenges and obstacles placed before you on your path.
Curious to learn more about values and discover your rich and meaningful life – reach out today and book a free “good fit chat!”